It’s obviously a clever plot to kick start the ailing UK car industry. There can be no other reason why the government and its “de-regulated” transport operator lackeys are happy to sit back and let half the country grind to a halt because of snow.
At least five days after the weathermen warned of a major snow “event” (spare us this new “snow grains” weatherspeak) there were still no trains running from many stations (including mine), no replacement bus services, no buses running full stop, roads still like ice rinks.
What a feeble response from the transport operators who, only a month ago, forced us to shell out for extortionate fare increases, despite their appalling standards of service.
What a creaking effort by local authorities. Unless you live on a major road you won’t have seen a gritter.
What a great advert for 4x4s.
Shouldn’t all your installation engineers have them? It’s certainly been the only way you would have been able to use the roads and carry on trying to make a living in security.
There’s a subliminal message here. Keep on gas guzzling and help Jaguar Land Rover survive. Not only good for the collapsing economy, but great for petrol company profits, as we've seen this week.
Did you do your homework?
The other possibility is that it’s all a plot to make us see the benefits of working from home. No public transport or useable roads means you’ve got no choice.
It’s what employers like to call worker “empowerment”. Close down that expensive branch office, make a nice profit on the sale and empower your staff to work at home, the one they’re paying for out of their own salaries.
Still, some do like the home office (as opposed to the Home Office, which no one likes).
It’s a way of life for small installers, and those in bigger companies can work from home, keep in touch on the laptop, get their appointments and order equipment.
For the self-disciplined, it can work. For others, the constant interruptions and distractions of home life make the work take longer and can break the boundaries separating work and home life.
The government wants more of us working from home. No surprise, as it’s the only way our inadequate transport systems could even approach being acceptable.
Where’s that British phlegm?
The Federation of Small Businesses, always ready to speak up on behalf of the SMEs, estimates the cost to the economy of this little episode at around GB pound 3bn and the British Chambers of Commerce say they’ve been warning for years about the need for better planning.
As one of the millions stranded, I personally resent the idea that I took “another Snow Day” as newspaper headlines like this suggested. The insulting implication being that we had some kind of choice.
Like either stay at home or walk the 18 miles to work carrying a sack of salt to sprinkle ahead of you?
Perhaps we could come up with a more appropriate phrase to describe those days when unusual weather (let’s call it winter, or for that matter spring, summer or autumn) brings our infrastructure to its knees.
How about No-Plan Day… Oops Again Day… Network Fail Day… or just good old National Incompetence Day?
Any suggestions?
Fans of that great film “Groundhog Day” might recall that, coincidentally, February 2 is the day Bill Murray goes into a time loop that forever repeats the same day. It all starts when he’s stranded by snow in the little town of Punxsutawney.
As puny non-excuses from transport operators often resemble a depressing time loop, I think “Groundhog Day UK” might be a fitting description the next time we have a weather “event”.
Watch your figures
Cynical as a result of being subjected to years of spin, the public no longer believes “crime figures”.
Sad it is, but who could argue otherwise?
So I can’t see that the new crime maps being provided by police will be anything other than a waste of their time and our money.
There’s no denying they will be “of interest”. You have to look up your own area don’t you? Included in this report is a useful link to all areas (see bottom of the report).
But practically, will they be of any real use?
Some say they will even be helpful to criminals and blight whole districts, knocking thousands of pounds off the value of homes.
In principle, crime maps are not a bad idea and this is not a criticism of police officers. But in practice the maps are flawed by the public’s suspicion based on their own experiences.
It doesn’t matter what you do with the figures if they are suspected of being, in some way, massaged, like this. Their currency is devalued at the outset.
Depressingly, it’s not likely the Home Office in its present set-up will ever grasp the fact that the public are weary of these flashy headline-grabbing initiatives.
Even more worrying, the Tories seem to be just as enthralled with the idea as Jacqui Smith.
It’s probably beyond the grasp of our political classes to realise that the public wants only:
(a) to be told the spin-free truth;
(b) to see substantially more police on our streets.
As this is not likely to happen, they might just as well use our money for a charitable cause.
Treasure in the turnips?
Banks … currently not the most popular of institutions, for either borrowers (you’ll be lucky) or investors.
But no matter how low the interest rate on your savings, no matter how much you trust the government to guarantee them, do not be tempted to withdraw your cash and bury it in the garden.
As Bill Seddon, MD of the Gardien security web site, keeps reminding us, our gardens are not safe from intruders.
This advice obviously did not get through to one poor old soul in Japan who had his nest egg stolen.
At GB pound 3m it was a pretty big egg.
Knowing Bill’s insatiable appetite for picking up hot news stories like this for an angle to publicise his unique web site, I shall be expecting a press release any day now.
You know, “Don’t let cuckoo intruders empty your nest” or “Beware thieves who take the biscuit – tin” – or something along those lines.
Mind you, it won’t beat his imaginatively tortured press release over Christmas telling people that “with the panto season in full swing” they should protect their own “Aladdin’s Cave” … ie, the garden shed.
